I don't normally do movie reviews, but after watching Only God Forgives last night I feel like I need to in order to cleanse my soul. That sentence alone is a good indication of what's to come. Directed by Drives' Nicolas Winding Refn this is a highly stylised, uber strange, neo-noir story of one fucked up mother seeking vengeance for her sons murder in Thailand.
WARNING: Contains adult content and spoilers.
BRIEF SYNOPSIS
Julian (Ryan Gosling) and his 'total prize' of a brother Billy (Tom Burke) are two Americans respected in the criminal underworld. They run a Thai Boxing club in Bangkok, a front for their massive drug smuggling empire. When Billy gets murdered the boys mother Crystal (Kristen Scott-Thomas) flies to Bangkok to collect his body and exact revenge on the person that killed her son. What follows is a twisted tale of vengeance, rage, highly suspect family relations, prostitution, torture, some nifty work with a sword, very little dialogue, lots of brooding looks and a shit load of really random God awful karaoke.
So let me ATTEMPT to review this movie.....
The movie opens at a Thai Boxing arena owned by Julian and Billy, two American brothers living in Bangkok, Thailand. The exact reason why they are living in Thailand is not really made clear until near the end of the movie, so at this stage, just assume its because of the easy access to copious amounts of cocaine.
Meet Julian
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| Fuck Yeah, Ryan Gosling. |
Julian doesn't say a great deal. 17 lines of dialogue in the whole movie. He has very few demonstrable emotions and one default setting when it comes to facial expressions. This is it....
He's is however, HOT. :-)
Meet Billy
There are no movie stills of Billy on line so imagine he looks like this but not quite as good looking.
Billy is a psychotic, rage-filled douche-nozzle who within the first 5 minutes of the movie, leaves the Thai Boxing fight, gets drunk and goes wandering around the dark and sleazy parts of Bangkok looking for an under-age prostitute to have sex with. He ends up in a brothel and asks the owner if he has 'any 14 year old girls'. Yeah, Billy screams WINNER from the start. Disappointed that there are no underage girls for him to fuck, he goes crazy and starts beating the owner and the girls in the bar to a pulp.
He leaves the bar and carries on walking through the streets of Bangkok. There is a lot of walking in this movie. Slow walking that seems to go on forever. This movie would have been about 20 minutes long without all the extended walking sequences and people turning around in slow motion.
I was hoping Billy might walk off his desire for nubile vajay-jay but sadly not. He passes a young girl on the street, another prostitute. He stops and stares at her and she smiles. Guess what? Yeah, he kills her. No surprises there, huh? We are treated to the scene of her grisly death; a blood splattered hotel room, her mangled, naked body splayed on the floor and psycho-fuck-knuckle Billy just sitting calmly on the bed, covered in blood and staring into space.
What could make this opening to a movie any better you're thinking? What about an appearance by God? Well, God in his human form as depicted in this movie....
Meet Chang
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| Asian bad ass. |
Now what I haven't quite managed to get across to you so far in this review, and its probably not something I can explain fully if you haven't seen the movie is the way that metaphor's, subtext and fantasy sequences are used to drive this plot line along. So when I say that Chang is 'God', I don't mean literally. He's not got long hair, a loincloth and sandals, he is more a metaphor for God. OK? Great.
Chang is a Thai policeman, very well respected and revered amongst his colleagues and pretty much everyone that comes into contact with him. Like Jesus. He has a special brand of policing which has garnered him the nickname 'The Angel of Vengeance'. Chang's style of justice mainly revolves around teaching the criminals a lesson they will never forget, dealing out his own brand of Saw-esque justice. He tries to teach people the error of their ways. Like Jesus. This isn't a man that spends much time filling out paperwork and eating donuts. He also likes to walk around with a 4ft sword concealed in the back of his pants which is quite frankly pretty hilarious. There is no way he could walk with a sword that size, and you never actually see it until he's drawing it out from behind his back. Again, I believe this is supposed to add to the God metaphor. He can summon a sword at any given moment. Seemingly from nowhere.
Alas I digress, lets get back to where we were. Bloody room, dead girl, psycho-killer sitting on bed. In walks Chang (slowly of course) with the dead girls father, a rather fat Thai man who doesn't quite display the depth of emotion you would expect when confronted with the dead, raped body of his 16 year old prostitute daughter. Chang tells him that Billy raped and killed her and then asks the father why he let this happen. Why did he allow his 16 year old daughter to become a prostitute? Chang then says that he should 'do what he feels is neccessary' and leaves the father in the room alone with Billy.
Did they sit down and have a chat, man to man? Oh hell no, the father beats Billy to death with a wooden stick. Hooray! We the viewers don't get to see the vile Billy getting his just desserts dished out Thai style, instead we view the scene through the blind on the door in silhouette. Lets just say, they were scraping the bits left of Billy off the floor for the next few weeks. It's kind of grisly. Chang returns to the room a while later to find the body count has increased by one. Dead girl, dead Billy, father now sitting on the bed staring into space.
It's at this point where I thought, OK, justice has been done. However Chang sees it differently. Yes, basically encouraged the father and gave him the opportunity to kill the guy that murdered his daughter but Chang blames the father more than Billy for letting his daughter become a prostitute. Chang drags the father outside into the road and asks him again how he could allow this. The father begs for forgiveness and says that he has 3 daughters and no sons, times are tough, blah blah blah. Chang says he is going to make sure that he never forgets to look after his surviving daughters, whips out his 4ft sword and cuts off the fathers arm.
The story then moves back to Julian. This is when we get our first glimpse into his fucked up subconscious thoughts. Once again, Julian is in a dimly lit, sinister looking, neon red room sitting on a chair......you guessed it, starting into space. The door opens and a scantily clad woman called Mai, seductively walks across the room. No words are spoken in this entire scene and its the first WTF moment of the movie.
She walks over to the blank looking Julian and proceeds to gently tie his wrists to the chair with some kind of ribbon. I perk up and shuffle closer to the TV expecting an imminent naked Ryan Gosling kinky sex-scene. On a side note, I spent the entire movie waiting for a kinky sex scene that never quite materialised. Things take a turn for the bizarre. Mai sits on the bed opposite him and starts masturbating. Julian stares at her expressionless, it doesn't seem to have any effect on him. I'm confused as to what their relationship is and why he is not creating a tent in his pants right now. This becomes clear later on. Poor poor boy. So Mai carries on flicking her bean inter spliced with flashes of Julian having his arms cut off by a sword. As Mai reaches her.....um, peak shall we say, Julian is dragged back into reality by the sound of someone entering the room. It's then that you see that Julian is in fact not tied to the chair and Mai has all her clothes on and is sitting on the bed. The last 5 minutes was basically Julian fantasising. It's all very Bobby Ewing re-appearing in the shower.
Julian is told by one of his cohorts that his brother has been murdered. This elicits no reaction from Julian. Just more blank staring.
The next scene is the first scene is actual daylight. It's a shock to the system after 30 minutes of darkness. Julian is standing with 2 of his drug runners in a wooden hut. They have hunted down the man responsible for killing Billy, the girls father. Poor guy. In the space of a day, his daughter has been murdered, he's killed the perpetrator, he's had his arm cut off by a twisted cop and now he's been dragged into a wooden hut to potentially be shot in the face by a vengeful Julian. Sucky day!
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| I shoot you in the face now, k? |
Julian points a gun in his face he asks him why he killed Billy. As the father starts to explain that charmer Billy raped and murdered his daughter, the dialogue fades out to silence and the camera focus's on Julian's face. It's very reminiscent of the scene in Sleepers where Robert De Niro's character is being told about the abuse suffered by one of his young friends at the Wilkinson home for boys. The reaction tells the story without the need for dialogue. Julian manages to convey the emotion of 'disgust' in his face well enough for us all to understand that he does actually have some empathy in him. He lets the father go as he feels that justice has already been served.
Without much dialogue its kind of hard to really get to know these characters. However, the next scene lets us a take a glimpse at the kind of life that Chang lives. He has a young daughter, no wife, lives in a nice house with peaceful surroundings. He seems to like to spend his evenings slowly stalking around the local park with his sword practising his bad-ass samurai moves. Oddly, no one in the park seems to think its weird that a 60 year old man is swinging a sword around in public.
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| Slice like a ninja, cut like a razor blade |
Now if Chang is 'God' it makes sense to have a 'Devil'. A She-Devil.
Meet Crystal
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| Too many glasses for 3 people? |
Crystal is Billy and Julian's foul mouthed, evil witch of a mother and the matriarch of this fucked up crime family. She's kind of like a really vile, ageing Britney Spears, all leopard print spandex and false lashes. She smokes like a chimney, swears like a trouper and has severely questionable parenting skills. She's my favourite character in this movie by far and has some of the foulest lines ever delivered in a movie that isn't banned in 500 countries.
We are introduced to the delightful Crystal as she attempts to check in to her hotel in Bangkok. With her dark glasses and sour face, she doesn't take too kindly to being told that her room is not ready. She demands to speak to the manager. This is the first utterance of a line that she will say throughout the movie 'I've come to pick up the corpse of my first born son, I've been on a plane for 30 fucking hours and this little bitch is telling me I can't have my room'. It's delivered with venom and its marvellous. Of course, Crystal gets her room. How could she not, huh?
Cut to more strange scenes of Julian wandering through dimly corridors for no apparent reason, seeing things that aren't there and generally acting like a weirdo. We see you, boo.
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| Remember when I was in The Notebook? |
Julian then has his first meeting with his mother. And shit gets weird. :-/
Crystal is sitting on the bed. Julian walks in and she says 'Did you miss me?'. She asks for a hug and something about the hug makes you immediately question just how close these two are. Oh yeah, maybe because she is TOUCHING HIS ASS as they hug. Oh good God, please turn over your 'Parent of the Year' mug to Casey Anthony. Ewwww.
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| No. Just No. |
The whole vibe during this scene is uncomfortable to say the least and whilst no actual mother and son sex takes place, incest is definitely suggested. In a way, I was glad. At least there was a reason why Julian was such an emotional midget.
Crystal asks Julian if he killed Billy's murderer. Julian says that he let him go which enrages his mother. He tells her that Billy raped and murdered his 16 year old daughter to which the cold, dead hearted bitch replies 'Well I'm sure he had his reasons'. Brilliantly evil. The end of this scene again implies incest with Crystal demanding vengeance for Billy's death whilst caressing Julian's bicep in a very un-motherly way. Again, Ewwwwww!
What becomes apparent is that Billy was very much the favoured son. Crystal goes to great lengths to emmaculate Julian, constantly comparing him unfavourably to her darling Billy. This plays out in a scene later on which we will get to shortly.
As Julian has refused to seek vengeance Crystal gets one of the workers at the Thai Boxing club to find and kill Billy's murderer which he does by slitting his throat in the middle of the street. Compared to some of the other poor idiots in this movie, he got off pretty light.
So what's next. Oh yes, another foray in to Julian's fantasy world. We are back in an empty bar, Julian sitting on an opulent couch staring at Mai who is obviously 'at work'. She's sitting on a stool waiting for her next customer. He stares at her intensely, walks over to her and reaches his hand over to her. She caresses it. This is a theme that has significance throughout this movie. Gratuitous close-ups of Julian's hands. We see him rubbing his hands, clenching his fists, washing his hands as blood pours from them. I'll explain the hand thing later on.
So Mai tenderly rubs Julian's hands and then of course he has to ruin it by putting his hand up her skirt. Not to worry though, cause this is also another fantasy sequence which isn't really happening. lol. He is drawn out of his fantasy by the noise of a drunk guy in the bar. He walks over and beats him up. There is no point to this at all as it ends as abruptly as it started and doesn't link with anything else in the movie. I think its just to show that Julian is frustrated at his lack of capacity to form any kind of meaningful bond with another human being despite really wanting to. Boy gots a lot of issues.
I finally figure out that Mai is sort of like his girlfriend but because of the mental scars from years of 'motherly love' he doesn't know how to love or have a sexual relationship with a female. He has mommy issues of the most epic variety. Instead, he is destined to fantasise about being with Mai whilst never actually following through. He likes her and I think she likes him, its hard to tell with these two as they don't say a lot and looked permanently sad.
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| Smile Free Zone |
Julian asks Mai if she will accompany him to dinner tomorrow to meet his mother and pretend to be his girlfriend. LMAO. I figure that he is either trying to prove to his mother that he is normal and she hasn't fucked him up completely OR he wants her to get jealous. He buys her a conservative but nice lacy black dress. Mai agrees. It's all very strange! LOL!!
At dinner Crystal asks Mai what she does for a living. Mai says she is an entertainer. Crystal then says 'Oh an Entertainer? Exactly how many cocks have you entertained in that little cum dumpster of yours?' ROFL! Julian's reaction to such rudeness? Um.....
Mai narrows her eyes at the vile Crystal and yup, that's about all the reaction we're getting here folks. Crystal then starts a disturbing monologue about how inadequate Julian is and how he was always jealous of his brother Billy who was apparently just better at everything. This little diatribe of emasculation ends up with yet another reference that implies incest. Crystal says that Billy always had a bigger cock than Julian. I burst out laughing at this point. She continues 'Julians isn't small by any means but but Billy's was just enormous'. Again, LMFAO. This takes the embarrassing mum cliche to an entirely new level.
After dinner, Julian walks Mai back home. He says that she can keep the dress but she declines. Julian looks slightly crestfallen. Just another rejection from another woman. She makes the fateful mistake of asking him why he lets his mother talk to him like that. He grabs her by the neck and pushes her against the wall mumbling 'because she's my mother'. This is the only point in the movie where Julian displays any kind of emotion. He starts yelling at Mai and tells her to take the dress off in the middle of the street. Again, I get ready for some hot, angry sex against a wall that never materialises.
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| Hey Girl. I like your shoes. |
Meanwhile, Crystal learns that Choi (dead girls father) was not the only one responsible for Billy's death, that there was a policeman (Chang) involved too. Crystal sends her men to go find him and kill him. Chang is sitting in a restaurant and almost has a vision that something bad is about to happen. He can sense it. After all, he is God remember? Crystal's men open fire with machine guns at the packed restaurant managing to kill every single patron except Chang, who escapes into the narrow streets of Bangkok. Comical.
Of course, Chang manages to dispose single handedly of the men sent to kill him. He throws a pot full of burning oil into the face of one and gets him to tell him who ordered the hit. He says a guy called Li Bo, ordered it and so Chang hauls him off to Li Bo's house where he promptly executes the man in front of Li Bo. He doesn't kill Li Bo who is there with his young son. Something to do with him accepting his own fate and not showing any fear. You know, usual far eastern, cliched, spiritual bullshit. Li Bo tells Chang that the hit was ordered by a man called Byron who is one of Crystals associates.
What follows is the most bizarre and grotesque part of the film in my opinion. Chang and his men turn up at a local karaoke bar to find Byron. The karaoke bar is opulent, decadent and foreboding with smartly dressed Thai women sitting motionless on random stools place around the room. No one speaks, no one smiles, its just plain weird and creepy. The only noise is one woman singing on the stage.
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| Go on now go. Walk out the door... |
Chang and his men enter the room and demand that Byron tells them who ordered the hit. Byron refuses and tells them to fuck off. Sadly, Byron doesn't realise that not only is Chang God, he's also a ruthless mother fucker with very little patience. Chang tells all the women to close their eyes and like obedient dolls, they do.
Chang picks up two metal spikes out of the flower arrangement and stabs then into Byron's wrists, pinning him to the chair. As Byron screams in pain Chang gets two more prongs and stabs him in both legs before cutting out his eyes and then jabbing a spike into his ear hole.
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| That stings a little |
Later, Julian confronts Chang and challenges him to a fight on the bare concrete floor of Julian's Boxing club. Sadly, Julian is no match for the experienced Chang and the old man unceremoniously whoops his ass, leaving Julian a bloody mess on the floor. Poor Julian, emasculated by his mother and now beat up by an old man.
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| Take that, grandpa. |
After the fight, Crystal tells Julian that Chang has figured out that she ordered the hit on him and that she is scared for her life. Oh boo-hoo, bitch.
She asks Julian to kill him before he kills her. Despite everything, he agrees, still looking for approval from his god awful mother on some level.
Julian and one of his men Charlie go to Chang's house out in the country with the intention of ambushing him. No one is home, so they sit and wait for his return. Chang's young daughter returns to the house with her babysitter. Charlie murders the babysitter and starts to head towards the little girl. Julian asks him what he's doing and Charlie says his instructions were to 'kill them all'. As Charlie raises his gun to shoot the small child, Julian shoots Charlie in the head as an act of redemption.
Meanwhile Chang and a police officer visit Crystal in her hotel room. It's at this point that a lot of loose ends get tied up and we find out exactly why this family is such a bunch of fucked up losers.
Crystal tells the police officer that Julian is a very dangerous boy, trying to imply that he is responsible for everything. Apparently Julian killed his father, Crystal's husband with his own bare hands and then fled to Thailand to escape his demons.
All the gratuitous shots of Julian's hands now make more sense. He's almost obsessed with his own hands. His hands represent everything he hates. His hands killed his own father. Chang isn't buying her BS and kills her with his magical sword. yay, the witch is dead! :-)
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| Lady, you are too old to be wearing a slouch top. |
Julian returns to the hotel and finds his mothers corpse slumped against the window. And just when you thought the movie couldn't get any weirder, he cuts open a hole in his mothers stomach and then places his hands inside the wound. Why? Why would you do that?? Like many things in this movie, you are left to draw your own conclusion. If it were me making this movie, I would have had Julian rip out the bitch's cold dead heart and fashion it into a hat. ;-)
Julian leaves the hotel and then starts having some weird and surreal visions. He is shown standing in a field with Chang who appears to cut off both of Julian's hands with his sword. I'm still not 100% sure if this happened or if it was just a vision. Anyway, it ties in with the visions he's been having the entire movie and also ties into his hatred for his hands.
The final scene returns to Chang singing at a karaoke bar with an audience of attentive police officers. I forgot to mention about the karaoke. Every time Chang kills someone, we switch to a scene of him in a bar singing karaoke.
**ROLL CREDITS**
My Opinion
This is definitely a movie that will split opinion. You will either love it or hate it. I wanted to switch it off after 20 minutes but then at the end, I kind of wanted to watch it again. It's disturbing and surreal but mesmerising to watch. It has a very distinct style, some might say it has more style over substance. The cinematography is truly amazing, the film itself looks beautiful. It's very hard to feel anything for these characters as they barely speak so when they die, you don't really give a shit. It is unlike anything I have ever seen and for that reason alone I enjoyed it. It's interesting and compelling, despite the actual story being weak. A lot of won't 'get it' and write it off as garbage, but if you are someone that appreciates a more art house style movie, that makes you think and you enjoying interpreting metaphors and sub-text then this is something you will enjoy. I give it 3/5.
